Off like a herd of turtles - Hot 100

I got home from dinner last night and was just too pooped to pop.  Or to write up my goals for the Hot 100 that began yesterday.  I began yesterday, being mindful all day that I'm rededicating myself (again for the trillionth time) to this journey to weight loss and fitness.   My refreshed commitment helped me navigate some eating desires yesterday afternoon before going out to dinner.  I got in a couple of hot sweaty miles on foot in the hot and muggy neighborhood.  But I was in no way perfect.  I ended up eating more at dinner (a Thai place) than I intended, and then had ice cream at home.  But that was it.  Not a binge, but not useful to jet propel me down the scale, either. 

I've been thinking a lot about goal setting and what I truly want to achieve in this last 100 days of 2010.  In my lofty and limitless mind I want to lose 20 pounds.  I want to stop bingeing entirely forever.  I want to incorporate daily meditation into my life.  I want to exercise 6 days a week for an hour and include regular strength training.  I want to MAKE PEACE WITH FOOD.  These are all wants.

I've learned after a year and several months of goal setting for various challenges here in blogdom that it does me no good to set goals that may be doable for a non-food-addicted/normal/issuefree/energetic/determined/non-arthritic/ache-and-pain-free person. Because on some days, I may have  energy; other days determination settles in to replace the energy I had yesterday.  Many days my 57 y/o body is relatively un-achy, but some frustration or emotional hurt is asking me to eat something for "comfort".  I have been closely observing myself in action since I began this blog in June of 2009 and have learned a lot about myself and my tendencies.  All this helps, but self awareness avails me nothing if I don't use it to make the best choices for myself each day.

But I've also learned that a goal is just a goal.  An intention to do something.  If I shoot too low I sell myself short and have nothing substantial to strive for.  If I shoot too high, I set myself up for failure.  And btw, I'm ragging on about this because I've been a drop out and poor performer in many challenges over these 15 months.  I'm sick of it, and desire to do better.  I've seen others struggle mightily for many months and gradually find a right rhythm of weightloss and self improvement.  I don't have more issues than they do.  Nor more stressors.  I cave in quicker - more easily lose resolve in late afternoons and assure myself, "Tomorrow I start FOR SURE".  And that's why I weigh 10 pounds more than I did at my lowest point last October.  This has to stop or I really won't ever lose weight and will be blogging about accepting my lumpy soft body as is rather than celebrating weight loss and smaller sizes.

With all this in mind, these are my goals for the Hot 100:

1.  Limit calorie intake to 1700/day.  This requires tracking.  Daily.
2.  Exercise at least 20 minutes 6 days a week.  More is great.  Less is not.
3.  100% accountability and honesty with my reporting on this blog every Friday.
4.  Weekly weigh in only, on Friday mornings.
5.  Stay in challenge through the end - regardless of my adherence to or accomplishment of goals.  No dropping out.

That's it.  All this is what I try to do anyway, but I miss the mark regularly.  I want to do better.  I want to be a person who actually follows through on her goals regardless of hard it is in any given moment.  I know I CAN.  The question is if I WILL.  Am I WILLING to gut it out when it's hard and I'd rather eat on the couch?  If I stick to these few and doable goals, I can't help but lose weight.

That's it for me.  I haven't weighed yet this morning and am off to do the deed.  And to begin day 2.  Thanks for offering out this time of intention and attention for us all, Steve.  I plan to use it wisely.
*just added after weigh in - this morning's weight is 207*