Vicious Cycle

The czar at my upscale gym denied my request to break my contract (like they'd going under without my monthly fee for the next 6 months), and truth be told, I'm glad.  Vickie of Baby Steps V commented yesterday that if I "had to" keep the membership, make it worth every cent, and that's what I intend to do.  I'm dressed and ready to go do some biking and treadmilling.  I'm also going to talk to them about the fact that when I signed this contract, the gal who worked with me said I had 6 free sessions with a trainer, which I've never pursued.  So - I'm going to claim my gym-right to this service.

When I joined this gym, I came in through a franchised program they sponsored called Healthy Inspirations, so I didn't have to pay the hefty "initiation fee" (what a crock that is!).  They've since dropped their affiliation with the franchise, which is why I ended up signing on for the full gym package.  In the HI program, there was a delightful sprite of a trainer who worked with all us gals, designing our programs and periodically updating and changing them around after quarterly assessments of our progress.  She was an energizer bunny in every sense, including positive attitude. 

The one problem - she really pushed me (and now I hear others) to perform the various strength assessments, and I've come to think that my first torn meniscus was the result of leg pressing 250 pounds (with her cheering me on), as well as some lateral skating type moves on discs for toning abductors and adductors in the thighs that my orthopedic surgeon said were not the best idea for 50+ knees.  Now I was gung ho and felt fully able to do all this stuff, and before increasing or adding new moves, Trainer Jess always asked if I had a history of "issues" with whatever body part was being targeted.  I'd never had even a twinge in either knee, and really didn't until after the fitness test that included the 250 leg press.  A day later while jogging up to Starbucks,  the L knee *suddenly* hurt enough for me to not be able to continue the jogging.  It continued to hurt for several days of resting it, so I was finally seen by an Orthpod...and discovered the torn meniscus.  It's been a long slow downhill of exercise for me since then.  My apologies to you who have heard this tale of woe before - guess I need to splat it out yet again.  I had arthroscopy to clean up the shredded cartilage, and had a rocky recovery from returning to work to soon.

I did PT after the first arthroscopy and once I was sufficiently recovered, began gingerly returning to some modified strength training moves - only to promptly tear the R meniscus and within 3 months have it scoped as well. 

I'm certainly recovered and able to swim,  walk up to 5 miles and do some biking, but both knees truly aren't the same as their pre-injury statuses as the arthritis that was in place before I ever knew it or had symptoms has been "awakened" from the 2 surgical procedures.  (The surgeon told me this is very common in women my age.)  This has since played with my head, frustrating and discouraging me.  I also see that my knees' "new normal" has become a solid reason an excuse for me to gradually back off from exercising and totally omit strength training.  The decreased exercise (that besides helping my body also helps my mind) has further contributed to my sliding away from keeping my food in check.  I've added pounds, which I feel when I DO exercise.  The old vicious cycle.

SO.......I'm taking the denial of my quest to sever the gym contract (for the $ reasons) as a  kick in the ass major jolt from the universe that I'm supposed to be at that gym on a regular basis.   I'm going to attack it with new zeal that will include insisting on the new trainer to which I'm entitled, at least for the free sessions. 

I'm really hating my return to soft mushiness.  Not that I'd left that territory entirely, but I was well on the way and more toned and defined than I'd ever been.  I could even flex my biceps and get a little bulge, which was just electrifying for me!  Why I haven't continued with upper body (as that wouldn't affect my knees for Pete's sake) is beyond me. 

Off to the gym I go, and then to the salon for a cut and color which I desperately need.  I'm feeling the need for an upgrade to my better self, on the way to my best self.  Gonna get started right now!