Friday, October 2, 2009


Happy Friday, bloggers! First, I want to thank my blogger buddies for kind comments yesterday after my sort of intense post. After I put it up, I reread it and thought I sounded like I hail from Crazytown. I haven't been so in touch with "old baggage" in a long time, and having those feelings come up made me grateful for how much healing I've experienced over the years and how much different my life is today in sobriety with a wide network of friends and family with whom to dwell in this earthly space.

I did weigh this morning because I've been weighing on Fridays to track my progress toward the November 2nd goal. Before I say my weight, I commit to not weighing even one time until next Friday. The scale is up and way out of the way so that to pull it down for a quick fix will take a lot of annoying effort. Hey - desperate times call for desperate measures! But I'm already aware of how much freer I feel not being tethered to "THE NUMBER" everyday, so I don't think I'll be jonesin' to hop on. And interestingly, before I weighed this morning, I realized I was hesitant to do it and had to sort of mentally prepare, not only for what the number could be (good or bad) but also pondering the possibility that weighing could trigger my binge mind.

My weight was 196, which is my lowest in 2 years. I got to this weight the summer of 2007 following an insanely rigid 12 step program that makes OA look liberal! I stayed at that weight for about 15 minutes before the inevitable gain began after losing 35 pounds in 2 1/2 months - way too fast from eating a way too restricted food plan. This also indicates that MAYBE, just maybe, I am at last stepping off the long plateau I've been on. I feel hopeful, optimistic even. And I feel very determined to press onwards and downwards.

There was no bingeing in my house last night, though I had many thoughts of it after dinner. Many. So I did what so many of you have suggested...I had a big glass of water, and then went to bed. I was probably asleep by 7:45; I woke at 11:30 when my husband got home from the Phillies game; I hit the bathroom :) and then back to sleep for the rest of the night. I woke up clear headed and in a great mood. And as I type, I'm eating awesome leftover salmon and sauteed vegetables from last night. Nothing better than a good lunch, smile smile.


  1. Great weigh in!! New lows feel so good. Have a great weekend!!

  2. Brilliant!

    Best wishes,
    Bearfriend xx

  3. Yeahhhhh! Good for you.

  4. Congrats .. I am so proud of you. I told you would be peeing all night if you drunk a big glass of water but it is worth it.You go girl!!

  5. Congrats to you. Great job. One step at a time, one pound at a time. Regarding your post from the day before I was thinking about one of my yoga instructors. As we try to balance in the yoga class, almost everyone falls over and tries again. This wonderful yoga teacher will say:"fall down five times and get up six." I have taken that to heart for my eating plans. So, looks like at the end of the week, you did get up by coming down at your weigh in. Give yourself a big hug :) PS. In my journey I had plateaus that lasted months. Have a great weekend.

  6. Great job on the loss girl!! And for reaching a place you havent' been in a long, so happy for you! :)