Thursday, February 4, 2010
I puffy heart all you blog angels who rallied 'round the mess that was I yesterday (grammar?) and bouyed me with support, kindness, understanding, and wisdom. I never got 26 comments before! Each was wonderful and I appreciated every word! Thank you all so much - you really truly helped me move through the murk in my mind.
That said, I am feeling better today - definitely lighter of mind, body and spirit. I had a perfect clean eating day yesterday with copious amounts of water (and subsequent trips to the Loo - for my English friends, BF and Patsy!), and that alone helped me wake up clearer and more peaceful this morning. The scale moved a bit, though not as much as I'd have liked; but I definitely know that a lot of the weight is water. Things are moving in the right direction. The food thoughts were there a lot in the afternoon, but knowing my weight yesterday morning made it easy to JUST SAY NO. Interesting that there is never just one right answer to everything all the time. For me to weigh daily is usually a very unsmart tactic and can lead me into my brand of Scale Roulette - eating or not eating to the all important number. But for the next few days, I see weighing as an important tool and compass to let me track how I'm doing coming off the medication.
I'm on the next lowest dose of Prednisone now - 20mg, and am supposed to take it for 3 days, today being the first. Girlfriend is asserting her medical know-it-all and shortening it to 2 days, and then 10mg for 2 days, then done. I know this drug well and that this will be safe and not decrease its efficacy one bit. And it'll be good riddance for sure.
Other positive news on the home front is that my right knee is definitely better. It's been the right thing to do mostly nothing on it but the essentials (like running laps at my job), and rest it otherwise. And I'm an inchworm's distance from the ground to donning the swimsuit and hitting the pool - probably tomorrow. Just gonna do it. Even if I float and let my legs drag like giant tree trunks, the support and bouyancy of the water will be therapeutic.
We have snow in the forecast for the weekend, so I'm perusing recipes to find some good ideas for soup or stew to have on hand. Even my cooking has been off. Hell, you don't have to cook to eat, now, do you? That's been part of my inertia problem. Eat what's here now and requires as little chopping, slicing and dicing as possible. I'm looking forward to getting back to food prep and will begin this afternoon. There will be panic shopping going on in the grocery stores tomorrow for both the snow and the Super Bowl, so I'm doing it today to be ready for the confinement that will probably be all of a few hours. Our local weather guys LOVE to make blizzards out of flurries. But I do love the idea of sanctioned nesting with healthy and nutritious food on hand.
Tomorrow is the week 5 reporting for the Perfect 10 challenge. I'm going to face it square on and honestly as I've been doing. So many of you reminded me that failure isn't falling down. It's not getting back up after a fall. Not only am I getting up, I'm on this journey for the long haul. In for the duration (which was my last blog title that only lasted about 2 weeks!). Even in the darkest place of the last few days, there was light in the periphery, and it's beginning to fill my space again. Out at the end of the tunnel. Thank you all again for your mammoth hearts and warm fuzzy love.